The term keeps running through my head.
The Urban Dictionary defines the professional victim as: Someone who (usually falsely) claims victimization any time things don’t go their way. Everywhere this person goes, they believe someone is taking advantage of them. This person has many many stories of The Man keeping them down, numerous abuse incidents throughout their childhood and adolescence and adulthood. This person will regale you with stories of their failures as a result of someone other than themselves. It’s never their fault, in whole or in part. Life just isn’t fair for these people.
Thank goodness I have very few professional victims (PVs) in my life. Happily my personal life and circumstance just naturally are not a match to this type of energy. Rarely I might have a client who may be described this way, but most people who can be described as PV’s usually don’t seek self-help modalities such as QHHT (Quantum Healing Hypnosis), because of course, everything that is wrong in their world, they perceive as the fault of others.
Matt Kahn has a great video out where he talks about this.
“Victimhood is not a matter of what happens to you. It’s not a matter of if people are nice to you or not, it’s not a matter of if people listen to you or not, it’s not a matter of if people are respectful to you or not.”
“Now as I say in a lot of videos, and as I say every time I teach… because every time I teach I always want to offer you the most groundbreaking but socially responsible teachings in existence. I never want you to take what I teach and think that it’s an excuse to stay in abusive relationships. So if you’re in a situation where you’re continuously physically abused, it might be a sign to put yourself in a better circumstance where you can be respected.”
“I’m talking about on a social level where you go to work, or you’re with certain friends, and, you know, with people in the world and you have to learn to energetically hold your vibration. And just start to see that the world you see that you’re afraid of is only as scary as your ability to be shut down by their powerful energy of negativity. “
That last paragraph is pure gold. There are two very powerful concepts here to not only understand on an intellectual level but to align with and form and manifest your world proactively with these ideas in mind.
“…you have to learn to energetically hold your vibration.” This is not always easy, but it is extremely important. If you can hold your higher vibration, if you can remember that you are not defined by another person’s opinion or reaction, you will not be affected by other people’s ridiculous rants or drama. According to Matt, this is an energetic “game” that humans play every single day. The PV has some well developed and confident energetic muscles. Heart-centered people, in general, haven’t fully grasped what it means to be confident energetically like this when confronted with extreme negativity. There are strategies that can diffuse the situation, but usually trying to change the PV on the spot is not going to work. Keeping your heart centered confidence and energy high and strong is possible. It takes some practice, but it can be done.
The last few words in that paragraph explain so brilliantly what is going on when you are faced with a PV. “ …the world you see that you’re afraid of is only as scary as your ability to be shut down by their powerful energy of negativity.” The PVs in the world are extremely powerful. Those who are awakened are particularly aware of their energy because the simple fact that one is awake allows one to see and sense all kinds of energy! You can feel the power in their insults and judgements.
So what is one to do when faced with such a person? In most cases, as you raise your own vibration, many or even most of these people tend to fall away from your life. But there may be family members or certain situations where you will find you are still noticing a PV demanding something from you or simply erupting nearby. Well, then what? Remaining centered and as certain and strong as possible within your own being is always healthy. Then you might consider the following:
“And the way that we went off the rails in the old paradigm, that was the completely the wrong direction, was that the positive people were trying to convert the negative people. Positive people don’t convert negative people. Positive people are the ones that use their interactions with negative people to raise their own vibration, and in response the negative people will over time begin to change.”
I’ve always loved the old Polish proverb “Not my circus, not my monkeys.” It helps one to remember not to align with or accept into your field or fuel the negative energy of PVs. It doesn’t help them for you to do so, and it certainly will not be helpful for you or your life. Arguing with or trying to change PVs almost always backfires and escalates the situation. Matt suggests a couple of surprising responses in his full video below. I highly recommend you take the time to listen.
Remember that change always comes from the inside and angry and hurt people do not really become aware of their PV behavior until they after they are healed from it. Your considered, strong and confident heart based response to PVs can help to break the cycle of abuse and victimhood, and actually raise your own vibration as you do this. Matt explains how below.